Thursday, 30 April 2009

obilgatory barracks crew shot of the month

hey guys barracks crew are out in iraq at the moment killing towel heads, spreading democracy and preserving americas freedom so all you guys back home can enjoy the superbowl, watch monster truck shows and drink budweisers (the difference is drinkability).
above is a nice barracks crew shot, for some reason blyth insisted on blacking himself up for the photo not sure why but whatever the corporal didnt seem to bothered about it, we gotta go back on watch now in case some bloody terrorist tries to plant on bomb on our humvee and drive it into an american flag. over and out

Monday, 27 April 2009

top 3 straight edge kicks

jc - good arms, right on the tip toe

wozz - line and length

sxe fat grl - presh

rod of the week

the sphinx of sheffield

finally got a car space for work

gg giggsy

Professional Footballers Association Player of the Year award for the first time in his career.

Sunday, 26 April 2009

not enough roids

I'm pretty sure you're not a meathead

the positives ie being a meathead far out weigh the minor negatives, pussies

meathead of streetphire used to inject this shit straight into his face you fucking faggots

armbar you prick

ever smashed a rowing machine in your face?

Saturday, 25 April 2009

yeah man that was fucking sickkkkk

new chainring - no swazzy tho

buck nutty

it was flat and it was 1 footed.... f off ron kimmer!

32 yr old stricker

Friday, 24 April 2009

winter training update

Just a quick update for all the fans. Here are the deets on Beats and Little Ben's current UFC training regime. It's been a brutal winter, but it'll all be worth it when the they're choking out peanut willy in the regionals.

Thursday, 23 April 2009

get in formation lads

the formation that won melon clan (rip) i35 css finals

this is the dos man

ODM original dos man

this is the melon man

i'm telling you it's him

paul hayes photo update.

ant clicks one out of a wallride, newcastle (paul hayes bike check/little ben, paul hayes, bobby skin=crew)
ian beak ice in gateshead.

toddy flatty down exi park. saying he never hit big al new year 05? (D C 2.5)

Wednesday, 22 April 2009

who's the melon man?

is this the melon man?


Monday, 20 April 2009

ploughmans wedge

Q. you wake up and your mates have put a cheese slice on your face, what do you do?

a) Get angry and knock one of them out.
b) Have a splif and a relentless and get in that nice neutral zone so you don't care at all.
c) Pretend nothing happened hide the slice and later on buy some pickle and make a ploughmans with it

beware dq

if you cant fly with the eagles, get out of the sky

late birthday gift

sweet 16th

Sunday, 19 April 2009


8 puppies (A.N.B.I.T.U.J)

better do one alright

Thursday, 16 April 2009

im here to entertain the children

is there anything funny about a melon clown lady?

top 3 shoes for a footjam

1. Odessa, possibly the only shoe to be made from vegamite and sosmix.

2. The Phat Osiris D3. presh

3. The broken ancle boot. Once worn by cannon dan
4.the pointed toe smart shoe worn by business men and indie scenesters would be able to get your toe stuck right in the tire, maybe a bit too much purch tho?

Wednesday, 15 April 2009

big girls going down

mainy's past comes back to haunt him

was in blockbuster the other day in the silent horror section and found this hidden gem behind a copy of nausferatu.

Monday, 13 April 2009

cat saves melon

it was a near disaster when this beautiful watermelon was washed out to sea but the melon team cat saved the day.
cats and melons??

quick trip out

get some lsd and sit off

Friday, 10 April 2009

top 5 melon 3 lurkers

over the past few weeks with the aid of uplink and a few cl_ commands melon 3 has found some of the previously unknown shadowy lurkers who although enjoy the in joke utter bullshit posts that inhabit the blog wouldnt ever look you in the eye as so much say they come on here for a quick read

so here are the top 5 lurkers of melon blog in no particular order

1, noel sharkey - former robot wars judge and convicted psycho often visits the blog in the early hours of the morning hoping to catch some drunken dodgy posts that often vanish by morning or fade into the drafts. Sharkey currently lives in a cul de sac in manchester with around 30 robots and at present is involved in a lengthy divorce procedure with his estranged wife.

2, pro bmxers

uplinks tech hacking system managed to track down a number of pro bmxers who visits the blog on a daily basis so many in fact that not one should be named individualy but here are a few names for those interested - corey martinez (still hoping for that projesus post), diablo (onthedownlow bike explosion fame, apparently he really likes wozzys posts??) paul baker (who?), markus wilke (massive shoes pyjama 2 foot ramp phase) the most notable though of all the names uplink found is that of mike laird at a recent CFB comp after a sick vert session where laird got 12th on pro vert (boro style) laird was heard saying "melon blog reminds me of that time mirra did the double flip and i shouted 'fuck yeah!!!'" hatebreed 05 ftw keep on rocking a free world laird m8

3. hedonism bot

melon blog is mostly about hedonism, hedonism and sketchers so no wonder he lurks here.

4. prince

all round nutjob and arguably the most luda man on earth prince has his homepage set to melon blog but recently sent an email to us asking for more posts about steve from gamesworkshop dont worry you fucking nutter a steve how to paint orks post is in the works, he is also confused by the majority of wozzys posts as he disscuss's in his latest album on the track 'what the fuck am i meant to feel?'

5 lizo

known as that little weird guy who lives inside your telly, lizo spends most of his free time on the melon blog and believes its helped him get over his recent violent heroin addiction. np lizo mate glad to be off service lizo was last spotted in corp big room tops off killing everyone too the knot, meathead.

Thursday, 9 April 2009

While wozzy was away...

since wozzy wasn't in the garage for the last few key checks and tweaks, the lads forgot to bleed the breaks and this happens

Don't take your eyes off the ball Wozz

Sunday, 5 April 2009

top 3 quotes (bcn)

"3 euro mouthful"
"get chinese flag on there"
"big hairy twat"
"i´m off to bed me"(pussy)
"7 slices strong stack"

Q."can i have a beer please"(shot bar)
A. no have a cock squirting on your face
Q. bristol student "what do i do with this flaming shot and marshmallow"
A. "set it on fire and fucking eat it"

terminator x 2 already dropped level up satan shot tomorrow night (more pregnancy)


Do one

Size: Small - stocky little meathead

Height: About 38 cm (15 inches) (can be grown to 6ft if needed) Weight: 22.5 - 25 kg (50 - 55 lb) (Heavy)

Life Span: 1939- 45

Grooming: not nessecary

Exercise: short walk down the rock, bench press followed by roids (dbol), then down the kenal 4 a good ruck.

Feeding: fish and chips

Temperament: sid vicious

Country of Origin: Britain obviously

Other Names: English Bulldog, British Bulldog, fuhrurh, dinosaur, dak roach

Saturday, 4 April 2009

getting pregnant

"someones getting pregnant tonight"

aka terminator


beer crew (pic below) in barca as we speak

glhf over there boys


is this man the new face of melon 3?


Thursday, 2 April 2009


the frijj is your friend. 'paper water please'

rile dog eats some tabby pasta

'shit happens when you party naked' teesh.

badman and jimmy hill

'got any chickers?'


mainy's best smug face. 'pretty sure i'm in shot crew'

Wednesday, 1 April 2009

a word of warning.

a little word of warning from south yorkshire police,''if a random selector machine is found,leave it were it is found,and dial 999'' it is said that the''random selector machine'' is to give of a large electric shock and can seriously harm a human being,the above pictures show 2 people playing with the ''random selector machine''they was sharing a ambulance a few minutes after with burns to there hands and body.

The second picture down shows a small boy who thought it would be a good idea to press the number 24 on the ''random selector machine'' he got away lucky with a small shock and was able to walk away,but as you can see he wasent a happy lad.